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SPAM Thread II: SPAM HARDER

Started by Jesuszilla, April 28, 2010, 09:55:50 PM

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Jango

Wait, you should go on the road. That way you can chance a car-crash so that you can get experimental brain surgery to save your life, and then you can meet Saya.

UHMEEEEBA

The roads will be salted by tomorrow only reason they didn't do it today was they weren't expecting Winter weather for another 3 weeks and thus were not properly prepared.

Jango


Brandy Bogard

[spoiler][/spoiler]

Fusion

More pointless ranting.

[spoiler]F-Zero Climax, although being signficantly more true to the show (Falcon Densetsu) than the previous game, is still of no higher quality in the end.

The game's new features include forcibly slowing you down in mid-air, which is a moot gameplay mechanic because that will never happen when you're in boost.  The ability to go into a semi-spin move (present in F-Zero X, and GX) and engage a different kind of "Boost Fire".  This kind of baffles me because, as far as the game goes, "Boost Fire" before this only meant the boost of speed you get if you have your engines up as the race starts.  This "Boost Fire" is just a spin move and boosting.  It has no practical purpose whatsoever.

I say practical in regards to the gameplay mechanics of F-Zero.  It offers NO advantages, guzzling twice the amount of boost with no actual impact on boost power, removing your ability to strafe and slide around turns, which means that it's not ideal for any machine with a good Grip rating.  There's an alternate version for evil villains called "Black Fire" but it is the exact same thing.  The alignment of this particular Booster doesn't matter as far as the game goes, because hero or not, IT'S STUPID TO USE IT.

Which makes me wonder why they'd put THAT in and take the Braking feature, which is probably more suitable for Climax's speeds (1900+ k/m, GX-level fast on a 2D game) and how you might need to lose a metric ton of speed.  Nope, your brakes are side-attack spamming, but be careful, some machines have pickup worth absolute shit.  The best part of it all?  They took out the performance settings... So you can't compensate for that low acceleration rate by setting it TO acceleration, you just have to deal with it.

It's no better than GP Legend, save for it's recorded story actually being relevant to the canon of the anime.  It's no surprise this and GP Legend killed the F-Zero franchise of video games, that is, I don't think the anime really mattered enough to make up for the lack of sales both games had.[/spoiler]

Jango



I hope this happens one day and all the Juggalos do end up on an isolated island.

Anjel

SNOW HERE TOO AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA >:( >:( >:( >:( >:( >:( :dhioas: :dhioas: :dhioas: :dhioas: :dhioas: :pedo: :pedo: :pedo: :pedo: :what: :what: :what: :johnface:

DMK



I'm late to the party, but that one guy as fucking Rugal? GODDAMN

Jesuszilla

... That looks more painful than I ever could have imagined. I knew it was bad, I mean hell, we all had NO expectations, but... I mean, God, who would do this?

Was there some sort of deal amongst movie directors to try and troll the audience by making the worst video game film possible? I really think Uwe Boll couldn't have done any worse.

It's only 7 minutes and I had to stop. This. Is painful.


Just try to keep things peaceful.

UHMEEEEBA

Licensing video games for movies is generally pretty cheap so subpar companies can just throw shit together and call it a day. Hell it's how Uwe Boll makes his money, on the tax breaks not the movies themselves.

Brandy Bogard

The preview pic alone has made me lose faith in most if not all of humanity.  :what:
[spoiler][/spoiler]

Jesuszilla

I just realized this DST is making me do everything earlier than I normally do...


Just try to keep things peaceful.

Fusion

Quote from: Jesuszilla on November 10, 2010, 08:06:17 PM
I just realized this DST is making me do everything earlier than I normally do...

I feel the same way.

DMK



Their coming for you Jesuszilla.

Jesuszilla

San Antonio's only an hour away from Austin.


Though to be perfectly honest, given this city's predispositions, I'm surprised I haven't seen anything like that here. If it's going to happen, it already would have. Maybe I'm just not wandering around the right places, though...


Just try to keep things peaceful.